Do good manners and showing proper respect make one money? Sure, though not necessarily directly. What they do is provide a person with one more avenue for adding value to a relationship and, it’s the adding of value to a relationship that helps one increase their income.
If you’re in a customer service position where you get paid the same amount of money regardless of what a person buys, it’s easy to think the above does not apply. But it does, for two reasons:
1) You are training yourself to act the proper way when you “can” profit directly. And, as T. Harv Eker, author of the book, “Secrets of the Millionaire Mind” writes, “How you do anything is how you do everything!” Good habits are vital. Repetition is key to forming good habits.
2) As Wallace D.Wattles teaches in his 1910 classic, “The Science of Getting Rich”, your goal is to become “too big for your place.” In other words, by providing so much value you are putting yourself in a position for advancement . And it’s often amazing how – and in what form – that advancement comes. (Space permitting, it would have been fun just to share some of those kinds of stories).
This brings me to an incident – actually a series of incidents – at a local market where I buy pre-cooked, healthy food. I love this place. The food is great, the owners are nice, and everyone goes out of their way to serve.
The one challenge is the young (between 18-25) men who take the orders at one particular department have the habit of addressing their customers with names like, “bud” or “man.”
Other than that, they are nice young men but I don’t agree with their greeting. It’s not right; it’s not proper to address people significantly older than you are by saying, “What can I get you, bud?”
Of course, I could say nothing… but that wouldn’t be me. I don’t feel it serves them to believe there is no consequence to that kind of lack of respect. So, a couple of times, I gently (keep in mind, it’s how you do it – always with tact and kindness) offered that they were welcome to call me “Bob.” When they still didn’t “get it,” I suggested that – at twice their age – I’m more comfortable with being called “Bob” then I am being referred to as “Bud.”
A couple of them understood; a couple didn’t. (Again, let me emphasize, they meant nothing disrespectful; they simply didn’t get it. It didn’t register with them. It was obvious from my observation that they had absolutely no understanding of this concept. Of course, this makes me wonder where their parents have been for… oh, I don’t know, the last 20 years or so of their lives, but that’s another story.)
One day, the manager – always a friendly and outgoing gentleman – acknowledged how much I shop at the store and elicited my feedback. I told him how impressed I was with the food and general service. I then asked if I could share a thought with him, but without getting anyone in hot water. He said “absolutely.”
I then told him my concern and he agreed completely. I said, “Of course, they are welcome to call me Bob. I’m an informal kind of guy.” He replied, “You know Bob, in our day, we used to have another name for customers… either ‘sir’ or ‘ma’am.'”
“I agree” I replied, but I think in this case it’s enough just for them to understand the “why.”
He was fine with that and it’s obvious that a staff meeting was held shortly thereafter and that a new policy had been implemented.
Yesterday, however, a new young fellow was behind the counter. My friendly demeanor changed to very neutral when he addressed me as, “Hey man, what can I get you?”
“Feel free to call me Bob.”
Apparently, he remembered what he was taught his first day on the job and then referred to me as “sir.”
Personally, I’m good with Bob. I think he’s better off with sir. At least until he forms the right habit. He seems like a really nice kid and it thrills me to know that he is now putting himself into a position of growth.
I hear politicians quite often use “The Children” as the excuse for burdensome taxation. Perhaps one of the best things we can do for “The Children” is to teach them some basic manners. They’ll be happier, healthier and wealthier, and will pass the same along to their children.
Manners do count, and they make a difference in one’s personal effectiveness and long-term income. Yes, eventually, manners even make money.
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Bob Burg speaks on “Endless Referrals” and “Positive Persuasion.” He is author of “Endless Referrals: Network Your Everyday Contacts Into Sales”, “Winning Without Intimidation: The Art of Positive Persuasion”, and co-author of “The Go-Giver.” Visit Bob at www.burg.com.
– What are your thoughts on the advice you just read? Is there any thing you’d care to add?