I woke up to a dismal drizzle outside yesterday. Bleached of sunshine, I felt queasy with the murky weather. I had planned to accomplish some writing for my blog yesterday and carved out the whole day for some creative works. Yet, recovering from a cold and fever compounded by the grey skies, I had all but a lack of enthusiasm.
Trying to perk myself up, I went out to the living room and sat on the sofa with a cup of tea. Then I lay down on the sofa. Then I rolled on to the carpet floor and spread my arms wide, hoping to vacuum up some motivation to get started with my writing for the day. I felt I had to push myself – did the renowned writers not advise that writing must be taken seriously and push through that block even when we felt underwhelmed?
Then I got up, walked into the bedroom and out again. Then I loitered in my corridor. Then I stared out the window. Then I went back to splurge on the sofa.
Then I concluded I had lost my day and wasted all that time.
I got angry with myself for not being able to pick myself up from the dire mood.
By chance, the phone rang and the bank called me about a certain transaction I had made. It reminded me I should have gone to the branch to sign some papers. Seeing that I had nothing better to do, I picked up the keys and walked over to the bank down the block. On the way back, I decided to run other errands I had scheduled for today instead, such as paying the bills, buying some food, and replace a broker appliance part. When I got home, I popped down to the gym for a quick run – also an activity I had diarized for today.
By yesterday’s evening, I realized I had not written a single word – but I had finished all the errands and activities I had planned for today. Plus, I felt better after some walking around in fresh air and my cold was clearing up.
Today, I woke up refreshed despite the hay of rain. I had my breakfast and went straight to drafting the ebook I had wanted to write yesterday. Physical strength was back, and so was my motivation.
In the last 48 hours, I learnt:
1. When unmotivated, judge whether or not it was time to push yourself harder, or time to take a step back to gain new perspectives. It is all right to do so.
2. When stuck on one road, take a detour, go a different direction and roundabout. You might be surprise at the new insights you find along the way.
3. Plans can change. Remain flexible and do not hesitate to rewrite plans, depending on your state, to achieve the maximum productivity.
4. Keep an open mind about your duties. Sometimes doing things in another way could introduce you to new ideas and thoughts.
5. Don’t give in to slacking, but take a break – and give yourself a break, if tired and worn out.
It took some meandering to arrive at the point of efficiency and productivity, but it was not a loss of time. Indeed, walking around yesterday gave me inspirations on how to start my draft, and unexpectedly gave me impetus to write this guest post!
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After an episode in major depression, Noch Noch is on a quest for clarity and self-awareness to be true to herself, jotting down her reflections at “Be Me. Be Natural.” and hanging out with Bearapy.